“你为什么想要有人担任你的生命导师？”这是我在餐厅里向一位坐在桌子对面的年轻人所提出的问题。一位我们共同的朋友建议陶德来见我，因为他希望有人成为他专业上和个人生活中的导师。

他的答案让我惊讶：“我想要从你的错误中学习。”我笑了，心想这个人还不到三十岁就有此智慧，认知到不必只从自己的错误和不好的决定中学习。你可以从那些已走过你想走道路的人身上学习，而且你可以从他们透过尝试和错误中学到的事受益。

但结果我并没有成为他的导师，因为他已经遇过许多其他有辅导能力的导师。许多年轻人甚至连一个导师都没遇到过，所以我认为陶德已经有足够的帮助。但他的意见让我想到有许多次我也做了同样的事－－不但从别人的成功，也从他们的错误中学习。

若不是别人让我知道怎么做，我不会有今天的热情去帮助别人学习如何有效地把信仰融入职场。而且他们诚实地告诉我他们失败的时候、有时他们屈服于试探，走捷径去达成目标，虽然他们知道那违反了他们的正直原则。

然而，就是透过那些失败，他们学会在作决定之前，先设定界限、确定自己致力于卓越和诚实的重要性。他们教导我，当他们远在危机之前就作好这些事，困难的决定就变得容易。

那些导师也教导我有关他们在婚姻、教养儿女、理财、处理愤怒和其他负面情绪、以及性的试探这些领域上的试炼、失败和成功。我也很荣幸能从别人的错误学习。

圣经提供许多人的品格功课，他们虽然努力去跟随并服事上帝，但有时还是会跌倒。我发现那些故事非常有鼓励性，不仅从他们的失败学习，也了解上帝并不要求完美，祂只要我们渴望跟随祂，且愿意在失败的时候悔改。哥林多前书10章只用两节经文就提供了很棒的真知灼见：

认识别人的失败并谨记在心。有一句话说，若我们无法从历史中学习，我们注定会重蹈覆辙。当我们重覆同事和朋友的错误行为，他们对我们就只有不好的影响。“他们遭遇这些事都要作为鉴戒，并且写在经上，正是警戒我们这末世的人”（哥林多前书10章11节）。

不要高估你自己的力量。从别人的错误中学习的益处之一是了解到我们也可能犯同样的错误。若我们是有智慧的人，我们会采取预防的步骤去避免重覆别人的失败。如另一句谚语告诉我们，预防胜于治疗。“所以，自己以为站得稳的，须要谨慎，免得跌倒”（哥林多前书10章12节）。

劳 勃．泰默西是领袖资产协会的传播部副部长，这是一个总部在美国乔治亚州亚特兰大的非营利组织。他也是一个有40年经验的退休新闻工作者。他写过一本书“最 佳状态的商业：箴言给今日职场的历久弥新智慧”（Business At Its Best: Timeless Wisdom from Proverbs for Today’s Workplace）。他也与David A. Stoddard合着一本书“导师之心”（The Heart of Mentoring）。要了解更多资讯, 可上网www.leaderslegacy.com 或上他的部落格www.bobtamasy.blogspot.com以及www.bobtamasy.wordpress.com 。

省思 / 讨论题目

1. 你是否曾把握机会，从别人的错误中学习？若有，请举一个例子，以及你学到什么。
2. 是否有人曾从你的错误中学习？请解释。
3. 你是否曾经应该从听到或观察到别人的错误中学习，但却重覆了别人的错误？后果如何？
4. 本篇“周一吗哪”指出圣经中有许多人物犯了严重的错误，但却得到宽恕且恢复与上帝的关系。你能想出什么例子吗？知道那些人失败，却没有被上帝弃绝，当你考虑自己的行为时，是否能鼓励你？为什么？

注：若你有圣经且想要看有关此主题的其他经文，请看：诗篇119篇9-11节；哥林多前书10章13节；哥林多后书4章7-10节；雅各书1章12-15节；彼得前书2章18-25节



“Why do you want to be mentored?” That was the question I asked the young man sitting across the table from me at a local restaurant. A mutual friend had suggested to Todd that he meet with me since he had expressed an interest in having someone mentor him in both his professional and personal life.

His answer surprised me: “I want to learn from your mistakes.” I smiled, thinking here was a man in his late 20s that already had the wisdom to recognize that you do not have to learn exclusively from your own errors and poor decisions. You can learn from people that have already traveled along the path you are following – and you can benefit from what they have learned through trial and error.

As it turned out, he and I did not begin a one-to-one mentoring relationship because he already was meeting with several other men in various mentor-like capacities. With many younger men lacking even a single man to meet with, I concluded Todd already had enough help. But his comment caused me to reflect on the many times I have done the same thing – learned from the mistakes others have shared with me, along with their successes.

I would not have the passion I have today for helping others learn how to effectively integrate their faith in the workplace if it had not been for others that showed me it could be done. And they honestly told me about times when they had failed, when they had yielded to the temptation to cut corners to achieve goals, even though they knew it would be a breach of their personal integrity.

It was through failures like these, however, that they learned the importance of setting boundaries, of affirming their commitments to excellence and honesty before they came to a moment of decision. Difficult decisions become easier, they taught me, when they are made long in advance of the crisis.

Men like these also taught me about their trials, failures and successes in areas such as marriage, parenting, handling finances, dealing with anger and other troublesome emotions, and sexual temptation. I, too, have been privileged to learn from the mistakes of others.

The Bible offers many character studies of men that strived to follow and served God, yet sometimes stumbled along the way. I have found these stories very encouraging, not only by learning specifics of their failures, but also realizing God does not demand perfection, only a sincere desire to follow Him, along with a willingness to repent in times of failure. The 10th chapter of 1 Corinthians offers great insight with only two verses:

Recognize other people’s failures and take them to heart. There is a saying that if we fail to learn from history, we are doomed to repeat it. Colleagues and friends can only be bad influences when we allow ourselves to repeat their wrong actions. “All these things happened to them as examples, and they were written for our admonition” (1 Corinthians 10:11).

Do not overestimate your own strength. One of the benefits of learning from the mistakes of others is realizing we could make the same errors. If we are wise, we will take preventative steps to avoid a repeat of those failures. As another saying tells us, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you do not fall!” (1 Corinthians 10:12).

Robert J. Tamasy is vice president of communications for Leaders Legacy, Inc., a non-profit organization based in Atlanta, Georgia, U.S.A. A veteran journalist, he has written Tufting Legacies (iUniverse); Business At Its Best: Timeless Wisdom from Proverbs for Today’s Workplace (River City Press); and has coauthored with David A. Stoddard, The Heart of Mentoring (NavPress). For more information, see www.leaderslegacy.com or his blogs, www.bobtamasy.blogspot.com and www.bobtamasy.wordpress.com.

Reflection/Discussion Questions

1. Have you ever taken the opportunity to learn from someone else’s mistakes? If so, give an example of when you did this – and what you learned.
2. Has anyone ever been given a similar opportunity to learn from your mistakes? Explain your answer.
3. Can you think about a time when you should have learned from hearing about or observing another person’s mistakes, but instead proceeded to replicate the error? What were the consequences for you?
4. This “Monday Manna” points out that numerous case studies are presented in the Bible of people who made serious mistakes, yet were forgiven and restored in their relationship with God. Can you think of any specific examples? Knowing that individuals like this failed, yet were not abandoned by God, does this encourage you in considering your own actions? Why or why not?

NOTE: If you have a Bible and would like to review additional passages that relate to this topic, consider the following verses: Psalm 119:9-11; 1 Corinthians 10:13; 2 Corinthians 4:7-10; James 1:12-15; 1 Peter 2:18-25